I Slid Into Her BMW...

The questions that came next had the ability to change my whole life…

Do I marry for love?

Or for a BMW?

…Or both?

But then, muggle panic set in.

Is she going to cast a spell on me?

Will I be chained to this BMW?

… would I like that?

You see…

My friend of 10 years matched with me on a dating app last week.

I got a message that said:

“Have we ever been single at the same time?

Maybe we’re long lost soulmates or something.

Ask me out.”

So we met up.

We have a pending second “date” and I learned some really interesting things on the first one.

She is a professional witch.

Like, her job is making content about hoodoo.

She learned it growing up in a weird mennonite cult or something.

And I asked her all sorts of questions.

“What’s the biggest misconception about hoodoo?”

(That only black people practice it.)

“They teach it in mennonite culture?”

(A lot of mennonites know it so I grew up around it.)

“What’s the biggest limitation that hoodoo has?”

(Well. I’ll tell you my limitation. I won’t do zombie spells that give you the ability to control the other person.)

“What’s the biggest strength of hoodoo?”

(Its ability to manifest money)

Wait. Stop. Hold it right there.

I dug into that.

Tell me more more about that.

(Well, I have an unemotional view of money. I just see it as, I need it to live in a capitalist world. So I need to make money objectively just for living. I don’t put emotional weight into where it comes from or how it comes to me. Money is just money and there isn’t anything else to it. A lot of people’s hangups about money are related to this.)

“How do magic spells remove money blocks?”

(A lot of the money blocks come from being uncomfortable asking for money. Especially for women. That’s a big problem for us. I have no problem saying, if you want this service - you have to give me money for it. No money, no service. I’m not shy about the fact that I need money in order to do it.)

“A lot of people in my industry charge thousands of dollars to teach you how to do that.”

(Yeah, that’s a grift.)

So now I’m scared of my friend.

I don’t know if she’s going to make me money…

Or make me fall in love…

Or groom me for some weird sex cult.

But I wanted to pass along her money advice from the old world.

Forget the mindset gurus, they’re grifters.

Let’s go straight to the magic.

Let me know if you want more insider deets on money mindset blocks…

And how witches deal with them…

And I’ll try to put my muggle panic aside to ask her more questions.

Questions like… how do you do a money magic spell?

I don’t think I actually asked that.

Do you want to know?

Hit reply and tell me your muggle questions to ask her.

-RCD